I love that Uncle Herman's gravestone just says 'HERM,' entirely misunderstanding the purpose of memorials. Meanwhile, on the floor of a bowling alley, next to a gutter where no one can see it, there's a lovingly crafted plaque dedicated to 'Herman Nightjar Fishhawk, bowler, drinker, friend. He always bought the next round, and he loved conspiracy theories so much he married one.' I have to infer — Did you, Wilbur? Did you change? Did you change, Wilbur? Is that what you think? That you changed your behavior and general vibe, somehow? Is that your perception of the situation? That you changed?
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